Guilty Pleasures

July 8th, 2009 by motivelesscrime View Comments »

Lindsay Lohan TwittersToday’s celebrity gossip headline should read: LOHAN IN TROUBLE AGAIN. Of course it’s nothing too serious but it’s a slow news day and it’s easy to pick on anyone whose nickname could be “firecrotch”. Apparently Lindsay-firecrotch-Lohan is back in the media spotlight for some weird cologne/perfume/tanning spray drama. Leave it to her to get tangled up in a legal mess over some smelly shit designed for hos who want to smell like a baby hooker. Some crazy biatch claims that Lohan and one of her groupies stole the formula for Sevin Nyne (seriously, that’s the name of it) from her and is seeking damages. Lohan had this to say on her Twitter feed, “No formula was stolen for Sevin Nyne. It’s a woman looking for a payday. That’s it!”

In other Firecrotch news, it appears that Lohan turned down the part of “Jade” in The Hangover. She is quoted as saying that the screenplay had “no potential”. The part of “Jade” instead went to Heather Graham and The Hangover has since grossed $266 million in the past month. Lohan’s most recent film, Labor Pains, is bypassing movie theaters and heading straight to ABC Family in two weeks. One wonders what Lohan did to cause such karmic retribution…FIRECROTCH!

Katie Holmes DancesMs. Tom Cruise, formerly known as Katie Holmes, has teamed up with So You Think You Can Dance glitterati to start a new dance scholarship called the Dizzy Feet Foundation. Nigel Lythgoe and Adam Shankman are two of the bigwigs behind the foundation which is debuting itself on SYTYCD on July 23rd. The show is set to feature Holmes recreating Judy Garland’s “Get Happy” with other surprises lined-up.

Bravo TV LogoMC reported yesterday’s Guilty Pleasures that Kelly Bensimon was the only cast member of Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New York City to sign on for the next season. Turns out the other cast members may have held out for more cash for too long. Now Bethenny, the Countess and the vampire-looking-lady are all on board but the two biggest bitches of the bunch, Ramona and Jill, are still not signed on. Because of this, Bravo has begun auditioning for their replacements. Better get on it girls, you are rich enough as it is…wouldn’t want all that botox and lipo to go to waste by not putting it on GayTV. Tsk tsk tsk.

Chris Pine at Domenico RestaurantI normally avoid being one of those celeb-gossipers who perpetuates the need to follow every celebrity around from morning to night. I don’t care who goes where to get groceries. That is…unless it’s Chris Pine. Yes, I’m pining for Pine. Therefore I feel only a small bit of shame reporting that he had lunch at Domenico’s Italian Restaurant yesterday. Have you noticed how he is one of those guys who is always in shorts and a t-shirt no matter where he is going? The rules for the beautiful people are a lot different than those for the rest of us. *Le sigh*

Kelly Clarkson’s camp has announced that her next single off her recent album, All I Ever Wanted, is going to be “Already Gone”. Therefore they have leaked the single’s cover art:

Kelly Clarkson "Already Gone" Single Cover

Am I the only one who thinks the photo-shopping on this image is a little too hardcore? She doesn’t even look like Clarkson. She kinda looks like that chick, Sookie, on True Blood. And what’s with that weird diamond/tear thing?


Guilty Pleasure of the Day:

I don’t know how to make this any funnier but…Hannah Montana is now a legitimate Linux Operating System:

Hannah Montana Linux OS

If you are lame enough to want to, get it here.

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Surviving The Good Life

July 8th, 2009 by pgclark View Comments »

In Jay McInerney’s sequel to Brightness Falls, he tells the story of 9/11’s effects on two New York families in the three months following the attack. The Good Life (2006), McInerney’s 7th novel, brings his audience up to speed on the characters that he has written about previously without requiring them to have read its predecessor. At 353 pages, The Good Life is divided into three parts: Indian Summer, That Autumn and Holidays – the Before, After and Resolution of the characters’ lives around the September 11th terrorist attack.

jay mcinerney 218x300 Surviving The Good LifeAn author such as McInerney is a public figure, a celebrity in his own right.  McInerney has set himself up as the typical aging frat boy who forgot to make the turn from college days into the real world: party-hopping, model-dating, marriages and divorces. Noted literary legend Bret Easton Ellis, author of The Rules of Attraction and American Psycho, refers to McInerney as his “Toxic Twin”. Among other notable publications, McInerney co-wrote the screenplay for the television movie Gia, starring Angelina Jolie. Because of this celebrity status and his membership (along with Ellis) in the literary Brat Pack, his way of life comes under review by extension of a book review. It would be easy to put McInerney’s personal life under a microscope – he’s no stranger to being in the limelight by way of seeking it at every turn. Suffice it to say that The Good Life is the life that McInerney knows: his people, his town.

The Good Life begins on the evening of September 10, 2001 in Manhattan. Corrine Calloway, an aspiring screenplay writer and stay-at-home mom to her 6-year old twins, and her husband Russell, book editor, host a dinner party. Luke McGavock, ex-banker trying to re-assert his influence with his 15-year old daughter Ashley, and wife Sasha, fashion icon who uses charity functions to further her own personal agenda, attend a fund raiser for the Central Park Zoo. McInerney strives to depict these four main characters as typical ladder-climbing New Yorkers: self-serving, self-centered, unhappy with themselves and their spouses, ignorant to the struggles and hardships of their family and friends.

By skipping over the details of 9/11, images that are burned into his audiences’ memories, McInerney seamlessly segues into the morning of 9/12. “Ash Wednesday. The debris – the paper and sooty dust – had surged up the avenues and stopped at Duane Street” introduces the reader to the devastation wrought as Luke encounters Corrine for the first time after having spent the previous twenty-four hours digging in the remnants of the Twin Towers looking for a friend. Corrine befriends Luke by offering him a bottle of water, and from there a friendship is born based on need: the need to contribute to the recovery effort, and the need to help each other make sense out of the chaos of their lives.

In a world turned upside down by madness, the friendship takes the path of least resistance: an adulterous affair between Corrine and Luke. Corrine is confronted by Russell’s lengthy and sordid affair with a former co-worker, and Luke discovers that Sasha is involved with a past competitor. Lost along the way is 15-year old Ashley whose stability is compromised by her parents’ growing separateness and the everyday angst of teenage life. Ashley’s effort to regain Luke and Sasha’s attention propels the reader into the third part of The Good Life – Holidays.

The last 84 pages of The Good Life busies itself with wrapping up the obvious problems. As a result, the novel ends with the proverbial whimper as opposed to the resounding bang that would have been more satisfying. McInerney focuses on the emotional trauma of that time instead of neatly wrapping up the issues and topping it off with a bow.

the good life 204x300 Surviving The Good LifeMcInerney approaches the tragedy of 9/11 from the standpoint that the citizens of the US were affected by these events as a group rather than as individuals; that everyone changed as a populace after 9/11. He addresses the devastation from the standpoint of those who lived through it – whether they lost a friend, a way of life or innocence. He shows how the same people struggled to return to their way of life as it was before 9/11. Socialites and white and blue collar workers come together in a unified effort to restore order and to rescue themselves.

While the old adage “don’t judge a book by its cover” should be respected, the jacket artwork of The Good Life is compelling: a plate, saucer, fork and spoon; a water glass half-filled;   jackets hanging on a display rack. All of these images are covered by the filthy residue that blanketed Manhattan – haunting and powerful reminders of the attack. McInerney tells the story of survivors who find comfort in each other as they attempt to shake the debris from their lives.

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Guilty Pleasures

July 8th, 2009 by motivelesscrime View Comments »

This is big. I might even say HUGE news. Now, if you are a teenage girl or a sexually confused underager, make sure you are sitting down. I think the rest of my readers might be able to handle this news standing, though I would advise against it. Here it goes: Man bangs are out. Yeah, I know. I heard a few high-pitched gasps through the matrix of the internet as you read that. Don’t believe me? Well, check it out:

manbangsgone 300x252 Guilty Pleasures

Zac Efron, Chace Crawford and Jared Leto all made the effeminate longer hair something to gawk at. Of course they are all three a little too pretty as boys anyway. Now that they’ve chopped it off I wonder how it will change their life-paths. I predict Chace Crawford will be fine since he is still the “it” boy of the moment. Zac was last year’s “it” girrrl so he best watch his back. Without that perfectly straightened hair he might not be signed on for High School Musical 23. As for Leto, well, we all know he ain’t going anywhere. Same thing with his career. (Thanks to Michael K over at disted for the image!)

 Guilty PleasuresI don’t really have any source for this piece but its important to get it out there in my opinion. Today’s Bravo station line-up was totally devoted to reruns of the last season of The Real Housewives of New York City. Why? Could it be because the cast has signed back on? Nope. Sorry, didn’t mean to psyche you out. In fact, word has it that only ONE of the cast members from last season has signed on for a third round…and its not any of the ones you want it to be. The crazy one, Kelly Bensimon, is the only one who has inked herself in for more abuse. I had hoped she wouldn’t be invited back.

liz taylor michael jackson 212x300 Guilty PleasuresElizabeth Taylor took to her Twitter account to announce that she would not be at today’s Staple Center Michael-Jacksonathon. She had this to say: “I cannot be part of the public whoopla. And I cannot guarantee that I would be coherent to say a word.” I support her calling it a whoopla. BUT, her getting up there and having a mini-meltdown like she did when she announced Gladiator as Best Picture might have made it worth watching.

I love blind items. The mystery, the intrigue, the betrayal. If blind items were a perfume it would smell like fresh blood. Here’s today’s:

blind 150x150 Guilty PleasuresCould it be that a certain gay blade has shaved off one beard and grown another? It’s one thing to hang out with that friendly filly who has known her way around a queen or two. Now he’s clinging onto a more desperate dame who, if I’m not mistaken, never met a gay man she didn’t like. His undeniable charms have worked pretty well in the past – his breakthrough happened when he focused on a guy mentioned in this very column. That time, he landed a series. The only thing that could happen with this b* is he’d shrink half a foot and lose all his hair. (Billy Masters via Blind Gossip)

Any ideas? Hmmm, here is a hint as to who I’m leaning towards. He was featured in a very recent Guilty Pleasures segment. Name starts with a B. Go forth and find it! It’ll be like Where’s Waldo but we will call it Where’s Mo? I’m patenting this idea so don’t think you can steal it.

fergieandjoshduhamel 253x300 Guilty PleasuresThis little article is just gross. I need a handy wipe for my brain just imagining it. Some low-class attendee of Josh Duhamel and Fergie’s wedding gave them a rather…questionable…gift. A stripper pole. Duhamel had this to say,“I’ve played on the pole more than she has…” Okay, I took it out of context but I’m not going to clarify it.

meganfoxisavampire 255x300 Guilty Pleasures

Megan Fox looks like Dita Von Teese became anorexic and let a vampire turn her. She also whores herself out as a car-washer to get into Michael Bay films. How low can you go?

Guilty Pleasure of the Day:

YouTube Preview Image

Trust me, its worth the five minutes. Its always fun to see Andy get all worked up over something or someone stupid.

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